Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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