i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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