I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
