both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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