Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
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