i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Couch. On fire.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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