Texts From Last Night

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  (207): View more from Maine

  so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you

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  (207): so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you http://tfl.nu/yn2g
  Replies (9) Good night (4616) Bad night (948)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.

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  (407): Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast. http://tfl.nu/8b17
  Replies (11) Good night (5491) Bad night (1327)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.

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  (205): I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom. http://tfl.nu/673j
  Replies (9) Good night (902) Bad night (4618)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat

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  (630): I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat http://tfl.nu/13uk
  Replies (29) Good night (1309) Bad night (4286)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  we need ur ladder

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  (612): He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume (612): we need ur ladder http://tfl.nu/n9qh
  Replies (19) Good night (7416) Bad night (1121)
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  (619): View more from California

  We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.

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  (619): We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed. http://tfl.nu/uy5s
  Replies (8) Good night (3756) Bad night (1092)
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  (585): View more from New York

  that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag

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  (585): that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag http://tfl.nu/7pz9
  Replies (11) Good night (1552) Bad night (3916)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.

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  (917): She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for. http://tfl.nu/k05b
  Replies (7) Good night (3792) Bad night (743)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass

  (240): View more from Maryland

  He should have died. Natural selection.

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  (301): Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass (240): He should have died. Natural selection. http://tfl.nu/8itz
  Replies (13) Good night (2797) Bad night (935)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.

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  (901): She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid. http://tfl.nu/lor2
  Replies (3) Good night (1171) Bad night (604)
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  (347): View more from New York

  I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.

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  (347): I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong. http://tfl.nu/uiaa
  Replies (15) Good night (1960) Bad night (758)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM

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  (610): I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM http://tfl.nu/hx9z
  Replies (23) Good night (1448) Bad night (520)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?

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  (913): She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car? http://tfl.nu/qi3u
  Replies (13) Good night (1421) Bad night (644)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.

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  (607): Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like. http://tfl.nu/4oye
  Replies (3) Good night (798) Bad night (551)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho

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  (210): Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho http://tfl.nu/voi4
  Replies (1) Good night (658) Bad night (529)

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