Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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