I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had