Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Randomize
