Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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