New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize