I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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