then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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