im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
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