There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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