Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
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