Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
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