you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
