Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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