dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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