OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
