She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
