dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Never joke about your clitoris.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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