Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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