you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!