My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
then he tried to convert me to islam
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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