just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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