HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
