You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
