I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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