I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
