You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize