Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
