I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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