everyone is single if you try hard enough
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
