he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
