Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Randomize
