Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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