Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

ready 4 sex 2nite?

(978): View more from Massachusetts

wow. woo me matt, woo me.

Fav 5 1688 1939
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung

Fav 48 14006 1497
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(276): View more from Virginia

Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face

Fav 7 4273 1152
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(979): View more from Texas

I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME

Fav 35 1334 4662
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(512): View more from Texas

they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version

Fav 32 2570 4926
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"

Fav 27 1355 5386
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(516): View more from New York

Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.

Fav 6 4481 1233
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(410): View more from Maryland

Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.

Fav 3 767 600
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(705): View more from Ontario

I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole

(705): View more from Ontario

Put me down for a bogey

Fav 0 83 10
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