So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
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