...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
