I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
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I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
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don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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