you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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