Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
