i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
