I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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