What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
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well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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