i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
