I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Just high enough for therapy.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
