Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Randomize
