what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
